If you live in South Africa, you know all about Eskom. If you live overseas, you will soon know all about Eskom as the Oxford English dictionary has unanimously agreed to replace the word “shit” with “Eskom” as the word better describes something “shitty” than “shit” itself. During the post apartheid era Eskom has been building a stellar reputation for itself, so much so that the national state owned power provider has become more synonymous with words like feces and excrement than any other word with similar meaning.
The change comes after years of locals having automatically switched out the words, a trend that is now gaining momentum overseas in such a large fashion that that the Oxford English Dictionary is in the final stages of making it official. A representative from the institution said that, “We at no point in time could have predicted such a thing happening, that a corporate name could re-incarnate itself as an adjective. This has never occurred before and is a first on so many levels. We are very excited about the possibilities and colourful dimensions the new twist will add to the spoken language, such as that’s pretty Eskom. Where the Eskom did you go? And, oh my goodness I just stepped in some Eskom.”
Eskom, who last year won an acclaimed international prize for the only entity world wide that advertises to consumers not to use its product, have been reportedly unperturbed by these linguistic developments and its management have been quoted as saying that any news that doesn’t include its inefficiencies as a national power provider is good news, and that the entity is thankful to finally be contributing to something constructive. This was shed in light of the company not having completed or maintained a project of it’s own since it’s re-inception under the African National Congress.
With the national power grid currently under serious pressure, the upcoming festive season promises to be proper “Eskom”.
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